Act One: Childhood A woman sits on the last day of her office job, swiveling back and forth in her office chair. Her skirt brushes her knees and she moves the mouse of her computer so that the scroll of the internet unfurls in front of her. It's raining. Or maybe it's sunny. Maybe it's … Continue reading Monopoly Has New Pieces: a play in 3 acts
My February was a bit of a shit show. How was everyone else's? Yeah that's what I thought. This month we have the Star. Thank the Universe. We all need a reprieve from the constantly bullying from everyone else and labor we're all putting in. January was all about manifesting, February was all about rules … Continue reading End of the World Lisa Frank Tarot: March
So exciting news. I'm working on a book. A year ago I got to write a really fun piece for Harlot Magazine called How to Face-Sit Like a Lady . It was a blast to write and I spent an incredible amount of time reading equestrian manuals from the Victorian Era and boy oh boy … Continue reading Ya’ll I’m Working on a Book
With Trumpcare/Ryancare/Pencecare or whatever now rolling out as an empty shadow of a plan, and the very real possibility of the Affordable Care Act being dissolved, it’s time to consider all of our options. With Trump pushing 10 Million people off their health insurance, the overall disarray and flip flopping on preexisting conditions, push and pull … Continue reading 10 Crystals Republicans Could Replace Obamacare with that Would Be More Effective than the AHCA
Are you suffering from second head growth? Has your skin started slowly converting into scales? Do you fall asleep when you’re tired? You have to try this miracle technique called analingus! This ancient art of licking someone’s anus will help prevent knuckle cancer, cleanse you of small aliens occupying your colon, and will give you … Continue reading The Many Medical Benefits of Analingus
Dear Patrick: Thank you so much for reaching out about the Major Gifts Officer role at the San Francisco Ballet. As you firmly insisted, the ballet has made great strides to be more creative and to draw in an energetic and youthful donorship. However, as you pointed out, I’m probably under qualified for the position. … Continue reading An Open Letter to the Head Hunter Who Called Me at Work
